Healing the Tigress

Ep. 10 - "Untigering" in Motherhood, Parenting, and Reclaiming Identity with Iris Chen

Healing the Tigress Podcast Season 1 Episode 10

You may know our latest guest as the popular "Untigering" on Instagram or from her book by the same name. Iris Chen is a recovering tiger mother, parent coach, and founder of the Untigering movement. After seeing the negative effects of authoritarian parenting and unhealthy cultural expectations in her own life, Iris is now on a mission to promote mental health, peaceful parenting, and self-directed learning, especially among Asian communities.


Because of our names and our ideas around the concept of the "tiger mom," we knew we had to get Iris on the podcast to have a conversation! In this episode, we talk with Iris about what she observed being an "American Born Chinese (ABC) raising Chinese Born Americans (CBA)" in China, after she lived there for 16 years. Iris has since returned to the U.S. and is continuing to raise her teenagers in ways that honor peaceful parenting and "unschooling," which we talk about as well. 


We discuss how Iris got to experience a "third culture" living abroad and then in turn defining how she wanted her motherhood and parenting ideals to look. Iris goes over the pivotal moment when she realized she had to change her authoritarian ways of parenting because she realized there was actually neurobiological development at play in her children that she had to take into consideration.


We also talk about how mental health and parenting can be closely tied in motherhood, and how "untigering" is not just about how we parent our children now but also how we heal from the way we were parented. Additionally, Iris talks about how we're not abandoning all ideals and traditions of our culture. Rather, we are blending our parts and seeing ourselves as bi-cultural and creating our own culture.


Please join us in this rich conversation about the intersection of motherhood, parenting, Asian identity, and mental health with the inspiring Iris Chen.


Find more of Iris at:
Website: https://untigering.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/untigering/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/untigering
Book: "Untigering: Peaceful Parenting for the Deconstructing Tiger Parent"

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Note: The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed are the speakers' own. This podcast is not a replacement for therapy or professional/medical advice. If you need more support or advice, please reach out to your own medical professional who can answer your questions with your individual medical history and background in context.